Title: Love or Let Go
Author: Peach
Email address: Peach1250@hotmail.com
Fandom: X-Files
Pairings: Skinner/Krycek
Warnings: None
Rating: R
Date: 08/20/03
Archive: If posted to your list
Website: http://us.reocities.com/peach1250/index.html
Disclaimer: The characters of Skinner, Krycek, Scully, Mulder, Doggett and the X-Files belong to Chris Carter, 1013 Productions and the Fox Network. No copyright Infringement is intended no money is being made.
Summary: Walter needs to make a decision. Will he make the right one?
Notes: For Ursula and Peja.



They were kissing and when they stopped for much needed air Alex said, "I love you, Walter."

Walter sucked in a deep breath, studied the eyes of the man in his arms, then stepped back and turned away.

"You can't mean that, Alex."

"Look me in the eye, Walter!"

The demand hung in the air between them. Walter turned slowly to face his tormenter, his sweet temptation. He waited; for what he had no clue. Alex groaned and strode forward as if compelled. Walter met him half way, and they slammed into each other, falling onto the sofa.

It was fast, violent, and over much too soon. As Alex stood, pulling his pants back up over his now-bruised hips, he spoke with almost no emotion in his voice.

"If you can't love me, then let me go."


"I can't go on this way, Walter. It hurts too much. I've told you how I feel. Think it over, make a decision."

"You're asking for a lot, Alex."

"No, I'm not. I'm asking for my due as your lover, if lover is really what you consider me to be. If you can't give me what I want, then I can't stay around letting you use me. It's very simple."

He walked across the room, and putting his hand on the door handle, glanced back. "I'll give you a month, no more."

Walter lay where Alex had left him, pants around his ankles, shirt torn, looking exactly like what he was, a man who'd just been fucked. He hadn't expected this, not from Alex. He thought it was all about sex with them.


Walter wrestled with his emotions for twenty-nine days. On the night before his deadline he came to a conclusion. He called Alex before he lost the nerve.


"Alex, will you come over here tomorrow night."

"I'll let you off easy, Walter. You can tell me goodbye on the phone."

"Come have dinner with me, Alex. That's not too much to ask is it?"

"No, I guess not. I'll be there."

The next morning, bright and early, he rose from the bed, showered, ate a quick breakfast then headed out to shop, making two stops before the grocery store. He had managed to learn a lot about his lover's palate in between bouts of fantastic sex. So into the cart went the makings for chocolate cheesecake, tiny shrimp for shrimp scampi, nice New York cut steaks, fresh asparagus, new potatoes, and a bottle of good wine.

He went home with his purchases, whipped up the cheesecake and slipped it into the oven. Then he cleaned like a madman. Fresh sheets for the bed, even new candles placed around his room, then a shower to leave him sweet smelling once more.

Alex rang the doorbell exactly at six, leaving Walter to wonder if he had waited outside until the precise moment he was due. Walter opened the door and greeted Alex with a smile.

"Come in, Alex. I'm very happy you're here. I've missed you."

Alex looked at him with a frown. "You don't need to put on such an act."

"It's not an act. Would you like a drink before dinner?"

Alex let himself relax a bit. "Smells good; what have you cooked, or did you order in?"

"I made it all myself. Why don't you sit while I bring it in?"

Alex nodded, walked into the dinning room, stopping at the door to take in the table. "Wow, Walter, I rate the good china?"

"It's a special night, Alex."

Walter moved past him into the kitchen without another word. Alex noticed a small box on the table, tied with a red ribbon. Leaning closer, he saw his name on the tiny card. Taking that as a sign, he sat in the chair on that side of the table.

Walter returned with a tray and started to set the various dishes on the table. Alex smiled at each addition to the menu. Walter had obviously paid attention to his habits.

"Dig in before it gets cold."

Walter sat in his chair as Alex took a bite of the scampi in the small dish Walter had put next to his plate.

"This is good, Walter. You've been hiding talents from me."

"Try the steak, I think it's done just the way you like."

Alex used his fork to serve himself one of the steaks; the sharp knife cut smoothly through it and Alex took his first bite. Damn, Walter really did know how to cook. This was way too much trouble to go through for a man who was about to give you the kiss off. Alex looked down at the box, wondering what could possibly be inside it. But when he spoke his words belied his thinking.

"Normally a kiss off this elaborate takes place in a restaurant."

"Eat – we'll talk about that afterward."

Alex filled his plate with the vegetables and dug in. Everything was perfect and very tasty. Walter had obviously put a lot of thought into the meal. Even the wine was perfect, and Alex wasn't a big fan of wine. Finally, the table was ravished, leaving not a leftover in sight.

Alex pushed back a little and rubbed his tummy. "If you made dessert it will have to wait."

"I figured we'd have dessert after you fuck me blind."

"Am I going to want to fuck you blind?"

"I hope so. Open the box, Alex."

Alex reached out and picked up the small box. Slowly pulling off the bow, he then flipped the box open. Inside were two highly polished platinum rings. Alex forgot how to breathe.

Walter rose from his chair and knelt next to Alex's.

"I just wanted you to know that I don't intend ever to let you go."

"Walter, I…I wasn't expecting…you didn't have to go…say the words, Walter. I need the words." Alex's voice had gone from surprise to astonishment then to meltingly soft and loving.

"I love you, Alex." Simple, to the point and as serious as any man could want it to be.

Alex pulled the smaller of the two rings from the box and held it out to Walter. Walter took the ring in his right hand, Alex's hand in the other, then slipped it into place and sealed it there with a kiss.

Alex reached with a shaking hand to get the other ring. After following Walter's pattern, he pulled Walter in close and kissed him deeply.

"Want to clean up before you lose your eyesight?"

"I don't need to see to load the dishwasher."

"Then get in that bedroom and get ready for me."

"Yes, Sir."

Alex watched as Walter rose and hurried out of the room. A smile curved his lips as he admired the ring on his finger. Damn, when Walter made up his mind he didn't fool around. He rose deliberately from the chair, his mind on just how thoroughly he was going to make love to Walter tonight and for the rest of their lives. He'd make damn sure Walter never regretted his decision.

"I hope you're ready for me." He called as he entered the candlelit bedroom. The man lying naked and spread-eagled on the bed, smiled and opened his arms to his future.

The end

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